In celebration of Father’s Day let us hear some of your best or new or not-so-original dad jokes.
Here’s a novel one I heard recently:
Did you hear about the dead dog tree?
It lost its bark
What do you call it when 2 people share some weed?
Joint Custody
4 Likes
What has 4 letters, sometimes has 9 letters, always has 6 letters, but never has 5 letters.
I’ll give you a clue: it has 2 letters and has 3 letters.
3 Likes
I went to the zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo was a dog.
It was a shitzu.
3 Likes
This had me scratching my head longer than it should’ve…
3 Likes
I gave up 
3 Likes
3 Likes
Any idea what show that’s from?
I don’t think I’ve seen it before
1 Like
2 Likes
What do you call a deer with no eyes?
No eye deer
3 Likes
Answer is 6 letters…
3 Likes
What do you call a dad with no kids?
murfle
Must be the missing dad gene…
2 Likes
What word begins with an e and ends with an e?
e
2 Likes
Wrong.
It is clearly:
Eee!
1 Like
Count the letters in each quoted word:
“What” has 4 letters, “sometimes” has 9 letters, “always” has 6 letters, but “never” has 5 letters.
I’ll give you a clue: “it” has 2 letters “and” has 3 letters
“Answer” is 6 letters.
4 Likes
A hole was discovered in the nudist camp fence.
The police say they are looking into it.
The police had their toilets stolen.
The detective said they have nothing to go on.
The first time I saw a universal remote I thought:
“This changes everything!”
When should you go to the dentist?
At tooth-hurty.
The past, present and future walk into a bar.
Things got a little tense.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye matey!
I invented a new word:
plagiarism.
4 Likes
What do you call a deer with no eyes standing still?
still no eye deer
2 Likes
Now that’s some quality dad jokes!
3 Likes
Yesterday while the family were together and the topic of dad jokes came up, my sister asks my 7 year old daughter what “a dad joke” is. To which my daughter confidently replied:
“It’s a joke that is so bad that it is good.”
Apparently she’d read that it in a book!
4 Likes
What do you call an Irishwoman with a bad squint?
Eileen
What do you call an Irishwoman with only one foot?
Also Eileen
What do you call an Irishwoman with two feet?
Noleen
What do you call an Irishman who has lost his legs below the knee?
Niel
What do you call an Irishman who owns a spade?
Doug
What do you call an Irishman who doesn’t own a spade?
Douglas
What do you call an Irish sheep shearer?
Shaun
What do you call an Irish rice farmer?
Paddy
4 Likes