Whats the difference between a camera and a sock?
A camera takes photos…
A sock takes 5 toes…
Did you hear about the guy handing out flat batteries?
Yip, free of charge!
I forgot about this thread. Here’s some more.
A mummy covered in chocolate and nuts has been discovered in Egypt. Archaeologists believe it may be Pharaoh Roche.
Which side of a chicken has the most feathers?
The outside
I was in a p**s mood this morning, so thanks for this guys.
Archaeologists just uncovered a fossilised dinosaur fart…
They say it is a blast from the past.
People say this house is haunted, but I have never noticed anything in my 372 years living here…
Why did the scarecrow win a Nobel prize?
He was a master in his field…
Ah you messed that one up a bit, it should be:
He was outstanding in his field…
Haha! That is better!
Just got fired from my job at the ice cream factory…
…I refuse to work on sundaes
A dung beetle walks into a bar and asks:
“Is this stool taken?”
Can I just say thanks - I read and shared a few of these last week friday to our company culture connect - we love dad jokes so I stole most of these 
What do you call a flying nun?
A bird? A plane?
Nope, nun of the above…
Keep 'em coming
I got mugged by six dwarfs last night
Not Happy!
What’s blue and smells like red paint.
Blue paint.
Why is there music coming from the printer?
The paper is jamming…
I got a new horse and named her Mayo.
Mayo neighs.
What do you get when 5 fish are divided by 2?
Tuna half…